Oak Conflict Management

Managing conflict behaviours

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News Posts

Date Posted: February 16, 2015
Hot Buttons are those irritations and annoyances that can provoke you into conflict. They are the situations or characteristics in others that aggravate and frustrate you, perhaps to the point where, despite knowing better, you instigate a conflict.
Date Posted: February 26, 2015
‘Could we call it something different?’ … is a very common response we hear from managers when we talk to them about delivering conflict management training
Date Posted: April 27, 2015
At a recent lecture on conflict management, I asked, why do we hit out at others when we are in conflict. Somebody responded, ‘to balance the hurt’. I think this is true, but I wonder is it effective? In my view, when we don’t blame, we are much more likely to ‘balance the hurt’ and resolve the conflict more effectively.
Date Posted: May 19, 2015
Dealing with difficult people – be mindful I spoke recently with my old school pal Willie Horton telling him about our new company Oak Conflict Dynamics and the work we are doing in training managers to cope better with conflict. Willie is what I would call a guru in mindfulness and works internationally with business leaders in helping them to achieve their true potential through the use of purposeful mindfulness. He shared his thoughts with me on conflict in the workplace.
Date Posted: August 6, 2015
We recently took a family holiday in Lake Garda. Knowing that the temperatures would be hot, we also knew to expect Mosquitos! Before we left I talked to a number of pharmacists about how to avoid the dreaded Mosquito bite and read up on as much as I could! I heard about their preference for different blood types, how they use body heat to identify humans etc.. etc.. I was given antihistamine and advised to take Garlic pills and by another, Vitamin B. I divvied up the various pills to all the family one week in advance delighted that I had finally nailed it!
Date Posted: September 2, 2015
I’ve been slowly reading Eckhart Tolle’s “A New Earth” over the summer following a recommendation from a friend at the gym. It certainly has been a workout for my mind. I wasn’t anticipating that it would necessarily cross over with our work in effective conflict management but having wrestled through extensive analysis of the ego and how it gets in our way, I was very taken by a short chapter called “Do you want Peace or Drama”. Because I think it is so relevant I have synopsised it here for you
Date Posted: October 3, 2015
Some business owners or top management in ‘tough’ business sectors take the view that their managers have to be equally ‘tough’ in dealing with staff and there is no room for ‘soft skills’ or a need for effective interpersonal relationships between themselves, their managers and their workforce.
Date Posted: November 10, 2015
Conflict is inevitable because we are all different. This is the challenge of effective conflict management. Our values, needs, self- image, beliefs and expectations vary from one person to the next. When we see people behave in ways that appear to disrespect any of these, we can find ourselves reacting negatively and experiencing conflict. The situation is telling us that we are different and in order to move beyond the conflict, something has to change.
Date Posted: February 8, 2016
This is one of the single most important constructive responses to conflict and yet one which proves so difficult sometimes. At a recent mediation involving an allegation of bullying, I was prompted to talk about the value and the need to Take Perspective.
Date Posted: March 3, 2016
Even though we seem to be witnessing a return of industrial action over the past while (LUAS commuters will vouch for that) it is still significantly diminished from the ‘60’s and ‘70’s when I grew up in Dublin. One of the possible reasons being that the number of workers in unions has reduced from 70% to about 30% in the last 30 years in Ireland.
Date Posted: April 14, 2016
In the context of the 1916 Commemorations here in Ireland, conflict and rebellion are topical subjects. We look back from a different perspective today and while we all mark the centenary of this event and know it has shaped us as a society, none of us would wish to see a repeat of violence as a means of resolving our problems.
Date Posted: May 16, 2016
As a manager, statistically, you’ll spend 30% of your time dealing with badly handled conflict. Almost all managers believe that doing this is part and parcel of their job. Snuffing out flames as they arise, rather than treating the root cause of the fire often leaves the problem untreated, it can also be a missed opportunity.
Date Posted: June 14, 2016
The Conflict Dynamics Profile (Individual) is a self-reporting psychometric assessment tool, which examines how a person responds to conflict. It measures ‘hot buttons’ i.e. the behaviours of others that trigger us into conflict, and when we are triggered, the frequency with which we respond both constructively and destructively. It measures 7 constructive responses and 8 destructive with a further distinction between active and passive responses within each category. The results across all responses are compared against ‘the norm’ which indicates whether the person is responding more or less than average.
Date Posted: June 17, 2016
'He decided very young to write his own life story. He decided before he could possibly have worked it all out, and before fate and time could have worked their will on him, he decided that he would not ever be dis-empowered’.
Date Posted: June 30, 2016
We initially started using CDP in our mediation work and now also use it as a highly reliable intervention in managing workplace behaviours. Our launch went down well and the CDP Tool was well received.
Date Posted: August 10, 2016
Conflict management and the importance of looking at our own responses and judge ourselves on how we respond, especially when we have been triggered into a strong reaction.
Date Posted: August 23, 2016
The cost of conflict in the workplace is highly underestimated. This may be linked to the fact that it is not accurately measured or monitored as part of most companies’ management systems. Data is commonly gathered in relation to absenteeism, sick leave, under performance etc.. But seldom linked to the underlying causes relating to conflict. In addition, many of the costs of conflict are never measured. How many management reports include the costs of presenteeism, of unproductive management team meetings, or time wasted in dealing with the fall out of poorly managed conflict?
Date Posted: October 24, 2016
The basic issue for society at large is that we are all poor at handling conflict.
Date Posted: November 11, 2016
I studied Shakespeare’s Hamlet for the Leaving Certificate some time ago. One of the famous quotations from that play “Nothing is good or bad, thinking make it so” has been a favourite of mine. Shakespeare informed us such a long time ago of the inherent danger in thinking.
Date Posted: December 1, 2016
Conflict is inevitable and it exists between neighbours just as it does within the family, in the workplace, in business transactions and in the world at large. Neighbourhood disputes are fertile ground for mediators seeking to practice their skills.
Date Posted: December 20, 2016
Managerial mediation provides a practical, simply learned tool for managers that enables them to achieve positive outcomes to conflict in their workplace
Date Posted: August 22, 2017
The catastrophic events in Barcelona last week (which brings back reminders of Manchester, London and Kabul earlier this year) present us with more horrifying examples of man’s inhumanity to man – how the world continues the struggle of coping with difference and human beings not having the capacity to live side by side in peace and harmony.
Date Posted: February 15, 2018
Organisations need to take a look at their processes and the ways in which they handle everyday disagreements and tensions. Managed effectively, these can lead to innovation and growth rather than escalating into costly disputes.
Date Posted: September 18, 2018
We’ve heard a great deal in recent weeks about FEAR-based leadership but we’ve also heard a great deal about the disastrous fall-out it has. Its not that other forms of management and leadership don’t sometimes result in conflict but the outcomes of well managed conflict can be positive.